The development process for CMEpalooza Spring goes through more changes than Derek’s demeanor (yes, it looks like a perpetual “I am totally checked out of life,” but there are subtle nuances). One year, we invite abstracts from the public. The next year, we don’t. One year, we have our adoring tolerating public vote for their favorite abstracts. The next year, we use a double-secret process that involves votive candles and a Ouija board. I’m one of the people who decides these annual changes, and it’s becoming hard for even me to keep track of.

One thing, fortunately, that has not changed is the overall quality of our education. Thanks to the creative folks in the CME community, we have consistently been able to provide innovative education — FOR FREE — to our adoring tolerating audience.

And so, once again, we proudly present the agenda for another iteration of CMEpalooza Spring. You may notice that this year’s agenda is split into two days (we announced how that will work several weeks ago). You may notice that a few items are TBA (but not many). You may notice that there are sessions that focus on a variety of aspects of CME planning, development, and measurement (we did that on purpose).

In the end, though, all we really hope is that you notice how you can’t possibly miss a single session of CMEpalooza Spring and set yourself up for a “long lunch” on Wednesday, April 25 and Thursday, April 26. You’ll still have time to work before and after our sessions. Just not a lot.

Quick aside: Derek came home from a weekend jaunt with the family to find his Internet connection was down (“because of squirrels or something stupid like that”). Who wants to bet that “something stupid like that” is that he didn’t realize that dial-up connections are no longer being supported by his service provider? And yes, that annoying sound of your dial-up Internet successfully connecting will be ping ponging in your brain for a while. [Note from Derek: Fake news. Per the Verizon guy working on the line, a squirrel was definitely the culprit. This may come as a shock to some of you, but after being told last night that the line would be fixed “in a couple hours,” it is still not fixed this morning. Does anyone have an extra AOL startup CD laying around?]

Big doings here in the City of Brotherly Love. I’m not sure if you are aware, but the local football team will be tossing the ol’ pigskin around the gridiron this coming Sunday in a little game called the Super Bowl. Eagles fans are known for our calm and reserved demeanor so I’m sure we’re all handling the excitement with dignity and class.

Let’s check in and see.

Ah, yes, just as expected.

More importantly, today is the deadline for submitting an abstract for a presentation at CMEpalooza Spring. We’ve talked about this enough in the past week, so I don’t have anything particularly interesting to add. No poems or lists or anything like that.

OK, maybe one poem.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Tom Brady stinks
Now submit an abstract

Nailed it.

Go to the CMEpalooza Spring application now and submit your abstract. The rest of you can watch this rendition of “Fly Eagles Fly” from the Central High School orchestra. Go Birds!

 

I hate cliches.

I mean, really, who goes around killing birds with stones?

I can’t remember the last time I was at the library and didn’t explicitly judge a book based upon its cover.

My son spilled a glass of milk at dinner just last night – did any of us cry over it? Of course not. We’re not idiots.

You get the idea (although I did avoid Derek like the plague last week since he was convinced he had contracted it).

Anyway, back to the point of this story.

You all know the tired cliche, “Try everything once,” right? Or maybe you are more of a “Do something that scares you” kind of person. Doesn’t matter, because this is one sentiment that I want to explore a bit more today as it’s one I try to remember as I sashay through life.

OK, yes, perhaps it wasn’t the brightest idea when I decided to drink a glass of raw eggs a la Rocky Balboa when I was a teenager (didn’t get sick, felt fine).

And it’s true, perhaps little 10-year-old Derek would have been better off not telling his friends, family, and everyone in the surrounding area that he wrote a 15-page love letter to the girl/robot star of Small Wonder (today’s fun fact: she’s apparently now a nurse in Colorado. Derek asks that you let him know if she is ever a faculty member for your educational initiative).

But the point is that we were both conquering our fears and trying something new and uncomfortable (and perhaps stupid). I understand that, for many of you, when we put out the call for submissions for CMEpalooza Spring, you were scared. “No way I am going to talk in public. Uh uh, never, never, never. Besides, who cares what I have to say anyway?”

In reality, though, CMEpalooza is the perfect venue to allow you to overcome your fear of public speaking. You don’t have to picture anyone in the audience naked (let’s face it, the CME crowd ain’t exactly overflowing with Adonises and Aphrodites). You get to choose your surroundings, whether it your home, office, or favorite quiet nook in your local coffee shop. It will be more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

You’ve only got a few more days to come up with a brilliant idea, recruit a colleague or two to join your presentation team, and then tell us all about what you have planned (submission deadline is this Friday)? What’s the worst that could happen? Whatever it is, it can’t be as bad as this.

So whaddya say? Let’s give it shot, OK sport? Click here for all the information you need to make your dreams come true.